Recently, I’ve been getting around to a number of books and movies that I’ve been meaning to read/watch for years. This is more due to coincidence than any concerted effort on my part. But when reflecting on this accomplishment, I was suddenly pricked small anxiety. The phrase “preparing for death” darted across my mind.
Upon reflection, I think somewhere in the back of my head I’ve been taking those “1001 Things to Do Before You Die” lists a little too literally. There was an irrational, unacknowledged security in building up a long list of stuff I still had to get to. My brain was literally treating it like a bulwark against dying. If I had just a year to live I might try to crank out a few long-avoided classics, so it must also be true that failure to get to those classics meant death was far away.
It remains to be see what, if anything, will come of this small insight.
Leave a Reply